Saturday, December 20, 2014

How Hirsute Are These Hoopsters?

The other day one of my students asked me a rather personal question that led to a pretty funny outcome.

"Why does your face always look like that?" she inquired.
"How does it look?" I responded.
Then came the hammer. She paused for a few seconds before saying: "It looks ... like ... dirty."

I guess a six-day-old beard isn't the best look for me. Here's a sample of what I'm often working with:


I guess she had a valid point, huh?

Anyways, that little embarrassing story got me thinking about real men, ones who can actually grow beards. Men whose beards look like hair, not like dirt. So I logged onto my Internet machine and punched in nbabeards.com, because why wouldn't there be such a site? No dice. How about nflbeards.com? Same result. Maybe a Madison Bumgarner-themed site called mlbbeards.com? No, sir.

After 40 seconds of frustration -- a veritable eon in Internet years -- I finally found a Website called sportsbeards.com. Unfortunately, the only recent basketball beard featured on the site belongs to Brian Skinner, whom a blogger named roc called "mayor of pube city."

But Brian Skinner is nowhere close to the pinnacle of Bearded Mount Rushmore. With that being said, let's count down the best beards in basketball right now, with consideration to both the NBA and college ball:

Tuesday, December 16, 2014

How Recycled Is 'Dumb and Dumber To'?

When I used Dumb and Dumber quotes to recap the beginning of the NBA season, I promised a review of Dumb and Dumber To as soon as I got around to seeing it. On Saturday night, amidst a Christmas pub crawl*, our friend Jaime bought a bootleg copy of the movie. We watched it on Sunday, and this is your review.

*Word to the wise: Don't start a pub crawl after a six-hour "pregame."

Any review of Dumb and Dumber To has to start with Dumb and Dumber as a baseline reference point. The reason so many of us loved the original film, despite its inherent stupidity, was that it featured so many original jokes. Clever jokes. Jokes that didn't follow the typical buddy-comedy pattern. Even the bathroom humor felt fresh. (Even though it definitely didn't smell fresh.)

Saturday, December 6, 2014

How Does That Count as a Football Throw?

During halftime of Oregon's rout of Arizona last night, Dr. Pepper sponsored a contest in which the two participants threw as many footballs into cans as they could in 30 seconds.

However, the competition might as well have been sponsored by Pop-A-Shot because here's a snippet of what happened:


Friday, December 5, 2014

How Insightful Is Grandma's Letter?

For those of you who enjoy my accounts of my grandmother as a character on this blog, you're in luck. The most awesome old lady in the world made it through another Thanksgiving!

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

How Office-like Is The Newsroom?

I've been enjoying this season of The Newsroom through my pirated HBO GO account, but I can't get past the show's obsession with casting characters that have already been typecast as other characters.

First off, in my mind, main character Will McAvoy will forever be Dumb and Dumber's Harry Dunne. I just can't look at Jeff Daniels* in any other way.

*My Dumb and Dumber To review is still forthcoming.

And in the past few weeks, The Newsroom has adopted a pair of characters from my favorite TV show ever. In Episode 2 of this season, the audience heard a whiny EPA administrator aboard an Amtrak. When the camera finally showed his face, it was Toby!