Well, in July, I managed just five posts. Horrible, I admit. But just how poor was that output?
My total of five posts in 31 days averages out to .161, or 16.1%. For context, that's worse than...
- ...newly-enshrined Hall of Famer Greg Maddux's career batting average (.171). In my defense, my July average was better than Dan Uggla's historically-bad mark at the plate this season (.149).
- ...the winning percentage (.250) of the 1962 Mets, who went 40-120 in their expansion season. That's right, my July production was worse than a team that inspired a book titled Can't Anybody Here Play This Game?.
- ...the 76ers' winning percentage last season (.232). I couldn't beat out a team whose mission statement has been edited to read: "We apologize for any wins we accidentally stumble into." I hope my July failures allow me to draft an injured center that won't play until at least 2015.
- ...Manute Bol's career 3-point percentage (21.0%). I did post a better mark than Shawn Bradley's career 10.3% from beyond the arc, though.
- ...the percentage of Trouble with the Curve I managed to stay awake for (19.54%). That's an estimate, but I'm pretty confident in it.
- ...the percentage of Americans who believe in ghosts (45%), according to The Huffington Post. I guess How Blank has been one of those ghosts for large chunks of July.
So in August, I hope to perform better than a pitcher at the plate, a center shooting threes, or a person trying to stay awake through a horrible movie. And since I broke my foot playing in a grown-ass men's softball league last week, I should have plenty of time to do so.