Tuesday, April 15, 2014

How Bad Are These Pairings With Jay-Z?

Much and more has been made of John Calipari & his "succeed and proceed" model at Kentucky since they made it to the Final Four. Even this blog has touched on Coach Cal here and there, and personally I could never talk enough Cal, Kentucky, or one and dones.

But this little factoid rose above the noise last week: John Calipari is boys with Jay-Z.

via sports.yahoo.com

This is nothing new, but it enjoyed some renewed press as Kentucky pressed deeper into the tournament. The Dan Le Batard Show pointed out just how ridiculous this friendship is, and Le Batard commented "why isn't Jay-Z friends with Roy Williams? It's equally absurd." The whole thing is absurd, to be certain, but I don't know that every coach being friends with Jay-Z is equally absurd. Calipari makes a lot more sense than some others do. Let's take a look at who the most irrelevant and un-cool coaches are. How bad would these guys be as Jay-Z's friends?

5. Steve Wojochiechowski - Marquette

The only rapper Wojo is boys with is Mike Posner. Wojo thinks he's cooler than nobody
via mikeposnerhits.com

During his playing career, this guy was one of the least cool guys at one of the least cool programs in the country in Duke, and he's been on that bench ever since as an assistant until a few weeks ago when he made the move to Marquette.

4. Steve Fisher - San Diego State

Via zimbio.com

In the early '90s you couldn't find a college basketball coach who was closer to coolness than the coach of Michigan's Fab Five, Steve Fisher. Now, though, he's just basketball's resident old dude, hanging out on the sunny shores of San Diago and chastising the NCAA.

3. Mark Few - Gonzaga

What with all the Washington stuff, he just seems like more of a Macklemore guy.

2. Tom Izzo - Michigan State

Even though "H to the Izzo" would have a great new meaning if he and Jay-Z became boys, I just can't see it. In many ways, MSU has been the anti-Kentucky in terms of sustained success with 3 and 4 year players. That, and he dances worse than Elaine.

You'd probably lump Thad Matta and Bo Ryan in with Tom Izzo in terms of un-cool-ness. But LeBron loves Ohio State, and has had a connection with their basketball team for years. To a lesser degree, Bo Ryan is loosely connected to Aaron Rodgers, J.J. Watt, and Russell Wilson. I'm definitely grasping with Ryan, but it's enough to keep him off this list.

via cbssports.com

1. Jim Boeheim - Syracuse

via http://rantingesteban.com/2012/01/17/boeheim/
He might reside in the empire state, and he has a real connection with Carmelo Anthony, but that doesn't make up for the fact that he's an old man's old man. He listens to Bruce Springsteen, and his cultural relevance may have peaked when he made a cameo in Blue Chips with Shaq in 1994.

"If Eeyore was a basketball coach, he would be Jim Boeheim" -John Feinstein, Washington Post

Does this look like the face of #RocLaFamilia ?

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